By Will Hess
The words to The Classic Crime’s song Spare Time blared from my speakers as I drove home from work. The Classic Crime is a small indie band that I was introduced to by a friend of mine in small group a while back and they quickly became my favorite music artist (it was the same friend that did all the branding for The Church Split. Check him out here) Although most of the time their songs are accompanied by myself with car karaoke, this time it was met with silence. These words echoed in my heart in an accusatory fashion – reminding me of my life’s calling.
A few months ago the vice president of my seminary announced their church was in need of a Youth Director. Those who have read my last post would know that three years ago, I stepped down from full-time ministry after a number of difficulties to focus on my family. For those of you who do not know, I have sent in my resume multiple times over the last three years to varying churches in my area and abroad. Either I would never hear back, or after a phone interview I’d quickly be vetted out of their processes. This is likely due to me being in a Christian Reformed area and my not being Reformed. In fact, many of my beliefs are not in vogue with the rest of Protestantism, Evangelicalism, and definitely not Progressivism – leaving me a bit homeless. Thus, I had sort of gotten used to sending in my resume out of mild curiosity, but being rejected for one reason or another. So like many times before, I sent in my resume expecting not to hear back. Oddly enough, I was sort of okay with this arrangement. After all, if no one hired me then I didn’t have to make the decision of leaving my current comfortable lifestyle.
Ministry had not been easy on my wife and I – emotionally, spiritually, or financially. It was hard. When I stepped down from ministry I had prayed God would provide me a job that would allow me to support my family and my wife to stay home with our little girl. God did that by providing me a job in auto finance. Learning this new trade was one of the hardest things I had ever done in my life, but I did it and we were making a great living! The world began to feel like it was opening up to a whole new level of financial opportunity. A beautiful house? A nice car? Fantastic retirement? Swanky vacations? All these things were easily becoming mine on the path I was currently on. It was comfortable. It was convenient.
However, I still had a strong pull toward ministry. I satiated this pull by recording episodes of The Church Split, serving as an Elder in my church, teaching theology in Bible Hour, and discipling a few young men. Yet, every time I went to the office I kept thinking, “I have scored the opportunity of a lifetime, yet why does it feel so empty?” As much as this bothered me, I often shook it off and pressed on. I had a family to provide for and deals to work. Plus, since no church seemed to want me – it seemed the decision was already made. My time in ministry was over. It’s okay, it was a good run and we had many fond memories.
[Frontline Bible Church’s Elderboard 2022]
Or at least…that’s what I’d tell myself…
The reality was, although I was making a good living, I wasn’t living in my life’s call. I knew that. I just didn’t know how to correct it. I even began considering doing a church plant, but timing never seemed to line up correctly. I was in a strange limbo. I was financially comfortable, but spiritually unfulfilled.
Soon after receiving my resume this church contacted me regarding their Youth Director position. Chris (their NextGen Director) scheduled a phone call. We seemed to hit it off well…really well. It was the most personable and authentic conversation I had ever had with a church. This shocked me and made me extremely interested, but I was also tentative. This church was six hours away from my home and the idea of moving was a bit daunting. Life was comfortable where I was at and I didn’t want to give it all up on a whim.
What took place next was a bit wild. Since I didn’t have the church job lined up (nor did I know if I would take it) I continued to work on my career in auto finance and landed a job at one of the most prestigious dealerships in the state of Michigan – needless to say things were going very well. At the same time I accepted this position, Chris called me and asked me to come down for an interview. I chose to go down, but now I was even more conflicted. I just scored one of the most desired jobs in the auto industry in the entire state, and here I was, considering leaving that all behind – for what? Ministry? Clearly I must be insane.
When we arrived we hit it off with the team and it quickly revealed itself to me that this church was different from others. The church, the people, all of them truly did seem to share in a common goal and had a passion for the gospel, their city, and reaching hearts for Jesus Christ. I had dinner with the team, survived a questionnaire, taught a class, hung out with the youth group, and overall had a great time. On our way back my heart was more conflicted than it was previously. What this church had was special, but so was the new job I just landed. Would I really consider leaving the keys to the golden kingdom to work with students? Again, I asked myself, “am I insane?”
When we went down, Cali brought our friend Tabby (our former editor) with her to keep her company while I was gallivanting around with the church’s team. Tabby had been one of the students under our former ministry and as she grew up she quickly became one of our best friends. Everywhere we went, she often tagged along. As Cali and I discussed the opportunity on our way back home, Tabby interjected with all her usual enthusiasm, “I think you guys are the perfect fit for the church. If they offer you the job you should take it!” Part of me knew she was right, but there was a major problem – the salary was too low to support my family. This left me even more conflicted. It seemed everything was a perfect fit for me, but the numbers were too far away.
Eventually they offered me the job and I asked if they could give me time to think about it to which they obliged. Since I knew the numbers were too far away, I began to make phone calls to every connection I had in the area (my seminary is in the same city and often partnered with the church). My goal was to see if they, or one of their connections, could get me part-time work to make the numbers come together. Try as I might, nothing seemed to be working. That Monday I resolved to call Chris and tell him that the numbers were too far away, and despite my best efforts, I would have to turn down the position. I was a little disappointed as it seemed everything about the position was perfect for me and my family. I told myself, “well, if God wanted me to do this, then He would provide a way. Currently He hasn’t, so I guess I’ll continue to work here!” Although I was a little disappointed, I was also relieved to a degree as it means I got to stay in the golden kingdom. After all, life wasn’t all bad right? I was making money, we were comfortable, and I could still minister in my spare time.
Then I received it. The text message from Chris asking if I could meet with him and another staff member that Thursday to “go over some things”. I agreed. I figured this would give me the opportunity to perhaps turn down the position face to face, unless by some miracle someone was able to bring more money into this equation. After all, the church hadn’t even hit my minimum number yet.
Boy…does God have a sense of humor…
That Thursday they called me and mentioned a few other areas the church needed help with. They then offered me to help fill those voids – offering me more money to do it. How much money? The exact minimum I needed. I sometimes wonder what my face looked like when they told me the news. I was blown away and I knew I was going to have to make a decision. A real decision. I couldn’t say I was rejected nor could I blame the numbers. Never have things ever felt more real than in that moment. They told me I had a week to make the decision (perfectly reasonable) and I got off the phone. In slight shock I looked at Cali, and asked, “penny for your thoughts?”
Her face was gentle, her eyes forward, and in the most peaceful tone she responded:
“I know it sounds crazy…but I think we should do it.”
I’ll be honest, I was shocked. Cali hates anything that disrupts her peace and few things disturb the peace like moving to another state. On top of that, ministry was extremely hard on our family originally – yet here she was – at perfect peace about this decision. I knew at that moment what we were supposed to do. God was calling us to a new home and a new ministry. Because the reality is, the moment I talked to Chris months before I knew where God wanted me – he wanted me at One Life Church in Evansville Indiana.
The reality is, although I knew it was the right decision, it didn’t make it an easy decision. I decided to think about it over the weekend and let them know the following week. I kept asking myself, “am I crazy?” After all, financially we would be cutting our income in half, we would be moving to another state when the economy is less than ideal, and I’d have to leave my family and friends.
That Sunday Cali and I sat down to discuss it. We made a list of pros and cons, discussed what each decision involved, and then we wrote down two fateful questions suggested by Brian Bode (the co-host/producer of The Church Split):
- What has been our life goal?
- Which decision brings us closer to that goal?
The answers to these questions were simple. Our goal in life has always been to make the greatest impact for the Kingdom as possible, and it was clearly this opportunity that brought us closer to that decision. With that said, we looked at each other and I asked, “so does this mean we’re going to Indiana?”
Cali responded the same as before – with calm sincerity. “It looks to be that way.” Finally, the decision was made and I felt at peace, the peace you have only when you know you’re taking a step in the right direction. Suddenly instead of nerves and unease, I felt excitement and a thrill for the next chapter of life.
Now back to the car karaoke. The day before Cali and I sat down to have this conversation, I was on my way back home from work and Spare Time came up through my Spotify DJ playlist. It was random. It was not by design. Yet, of all songs this algorithm chose, it picked that one. Suddenly the song I used to love for its depth of meaning felt far more personal as the second verse came on, “In the end, you traded petty comforts for your heart”. I didn’t want this to be me. I didn’t want to sacrifice my passion for comfort. I didn’t want to trade my calling for materialism. I belonged in the fight. I knew that, and it was time I faced the music (pun intended).
At the end of my life what will I have achieved? This is the question that kept returning to mind. I didn’t want to just say, “well…I made a great living and had many great things”. Materialism doesn’t satisfy the soul nor does it last forever. One day all those things will pass away, but it will be what we do for the Kingdom of God that matters. It’s not about living in the now but living in the not yet. In reality, the words I want to say at the end of my life are, “I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith”. I knew I wouldn’t be able to say that if I wasn’t fulfilling the calling God placed on my life. If you know what God wants from you, and you’re not doing it, then you don’t have spare time. Each moment is a moment wasted.
Life isn’t about trinkets, nor is it about comfort – none of those things can give you purpose, none of those things can bring you fulfillment. It’s funny how we all innately know this, but few of us live it out. It’s human nature to seek the path of least resistance. We love easy. We love simple. We love comfortable. However, it seems whenever we pursue such things our lives either become a mess or meaningless. Jesus never promised our lives would be comfortable, only that our eternity would be peaceful. We rarely thrive in environments that don’t challenge us and some of us have been sitting on the sidelines for far too long and need to get back into the game.
God’s not done with you yet, and if you have a calling on your life, then go fulfill it. Whatever passion God has given you, pursue it with everything in you and watch God work. Don’t focus on materialism, your wealth, or your comfort. That’s not what matters nearly as much as you following God’s call on your life.
My call has always been to serve the Kingdom of God. To be the hands and feet of Christ to the best of my ability. To give an answer to those who ask. To equip people to have strong reasons for their faith. To bring people to a deeper understanding. Due to this calling on my life, I’ve never felt fulfilled at any normal job – no matter how much money I was paid.
It is for this reason I called Chris and told him that we will accept the position of Youth and Missions Director at One Life Church in Evansville Indiana. We might have been beaten down in the past, but we weren’t done fighting for the Kingdom. The mission is too important. It was time we got back into the fight. The Hess family is once again on the move because God’s not done with us yet and He’s certainly not done with you.
So that’s it! That’s the big announcement! We are jumping back into full-time ministry!
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN FOR THE CHURCH SPLIT?
- More Content: Now that I will be working in ministry this should give me more time to focus on making more content as my day job and side hobby will now be in the same vein. I plan to pump out my own individual series and do a weekly episode with Brian on a relevant topic.
- New Content: I want to build an apologetics curriculum that will be free for individuals and churches to download from our website. This is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time, but time would not allow it. Hopefully, after we get a few things rolling, we can get this project underway.
- Adjustment Period: Since Cali and I will be moving this means there will be a short period of time where less content is made as we get settled in. After that? It will take Brian and I a moment to find the new groove as we film from a distance. Have no fear – the show will go on!
- Need Support: Running this operation costs time and money. We have a few generous patrons that have helped cover expenses, but usually running The Church Split comes out of our own pocket. With my income dropping this will impact us greater than it did before. If you would like to support The Church Split (and therefore our families) you can do so on our Patreon where we hope to bring more unique content.
- Need Prayer: Change is never easy so we could use your prayers! It’ll be different than before with Brian and I in different locations, but I am also excited to see what God can do. If you can’t support us financially? That’s fine. Just continue to pray for us and check out our content and spread the word. That alone is helpful.
Lastly, I would like to thank all you guys for supporting our ministry either by reading, listening, watching, sharing and sending us your encouraging messages. We want to continue equipping the Body of Christ for the work of the Lord, and we also want to keep improving our content. We have appreciated all of you who have stuck with us this far. Thank you. We are incredibly blessed to serve you all. Stay tuned for more content coming your way.